lladygrinningsoul: sassydetective: we all have that one cup in our house that is somehow better than the other ones
rodneykong: nayx: theres nothing funny about clouds
handsome-squidward: gameandwatch: natsugay: For all of you that believe that vulgarity in music is only from contemporary times then just remember that mozart wrote a song called lick my ass Proof for those of us that are unaware I’m crying listen to it
Good handjob tips:
Put your mouth on it.
razzledazzleflux: thepioden: hair-old-styles: harrystyies: What if oxygen is poisonous and it just takes 75-100 years to kill us? My science teacher said he thinks that’s true actually Yeah this is actually pretty much exactly what is going on. It’s why anti-oxidants are such a big deal. Bonus fact: oxygen oxidizes stuff in your cells or, in other words, it’s not toxic, just setting you...
assbutt-in-the-garrison: k1mkardashian: sometimes i read read as read when it’s actually supposed to be read as read
I don't get it.
Everyone’s bitching and moaning about the drama over what Duncan Keith said. I woud’ve said the same damn thing. Get hobbies or something. Why must people over-analyze everything? Seriously though.
peetasboxers: BOYS TAKE OFF THEIR SHIRTS SO WEIRD THEY LIKE GRAB THE SHIRT FROM THE BACK OF THEIR NECK AND YANK IT OVER THEIR HEAD THAT IS SO SEXUAL LIKE I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW YOU DO IT BOYS
acrosseight-dimensions: casteelix: in irish we don’t say “i love you” we say “mo bod é arm gnéasach” which means “i want to hold you until the end.” i think that’s beautiful.
metallickah: unrealthings: batreaux: this is my linen closet, *shows you some towels* and this is my lenin closet *shows you communist propaganda* #Bed Bath and Bolsheviks #communism works on paper but not on tile or marble
notmybaconyoubitch: In hockey, you don’t say “I love you”, you say “you dipshits better score on this power play or so help me” which roughly translates to “you motherfuckers, shoot the god damn puck” and I think that’s beautiful
yourbones: somegirlnamedkaitlyn: My dog understands the word “No,” so how are you going to tell me teenage boys don’t know the difference between rape and consent? Nailed it.
How to blow a bubble:
shattered-mirr0rs: thebestlolz: Step 1: First go like this Step 2: Spin around Step 3: STOP! Step 4: Double take 3 times; 1…2…3! Step 5: Then Pelvic Thrust! Step 6: Stop on your right foot, DON’T FORGET IT! Step 7: Now it’s time to bring it around town. Step 8: Then yo do this, then this, and this, and that, and this, and that, and this. Step 9: THEN…! Thats how i do...
widdlekes: some dude asked me what cup size i was and i’m like:
mountainmantoothpick: every time you smell a flower remember you are smelling sex organs you are smelling flower semen, vagina, and penis all at once enjoy your summer
cosmo tip #660
expertcosmotips: point at his dick and ask “you gonna eat that?”
this is a post about terrible nhl.com puns
sheercompulsion: SIGH Read More
acrackinthetardis: vanehwasreal: in sweden you dont say “i love you”, you say “ska vi rida isbjörn in i solnedgången”. i think thats really beautiful.